Sunday, January 22, 2017
As a teenager, and on into college, I thought of myself as a crossdresser. In addition to lurking on transformation-themed sites like Fictionmania, I occasionally visited crossdressing sites. I couldn't really identify with the crossdressers I found online, though.. their motives, their experiences, their understanding of their crossdressing, did not match mine. And as compelled as I was to wear women's clothing, when I did dress as a woman, I didn't feel the pleasure, or the release, or the arousal, or the calmness, that I expected to feel. It puzzled me.
At last I discovered a community of transsexual people online, and I found that I could fully identify with their feelings and experiences, which were very different from those of the crossdressers I'd come across. That was when I realized that I was transsexual, not a crossdresser, and that being transsxual and being a crossdresser were two very different things.
Women's clothing is fun, and it's a nice way to express myself, and it helps me feel more feminine. But I didn't just want to wear women's clothing before my transformation. I wanted to be a woman.
Also, twirling around in a flowy skirt is delightful. :)