Saturday, April 1, 2017

The Noob 24

You can follow this and my other series on my series page.


  1. I liked the fight scene up until the end . . . it didn't fit. Alicia is in command of the fight until she calms down and then as she goes to finish the beast off she takes a mortal blow? This seems off.


    1. This is a fair point. Fight scenes aren't really my strong point. I guess I was going for the sudden shock at the end of the scene... but I think you're right. It probably would have been better to have Alicia injured early in the scene and have her fight through her injury. There's a different, maybe a better, kind of tension in that... and it seems very barbarianish to use adrenaline to keep yourself standing when an injury should have brought you down. Good critique. :)